Heard my [19F] black boyfriend [25M] refer to me as his “white conquest” and I’m deeply confused

Let me start by saying my boyfriend has been the sweetest guy since we’ve been together the past seven months. The interracial bit - me being white, him black, had never been an issue.

Lately I’ve been sleeping over his apartment. I went to bed early two nights ago because I had a headache. His friends came over to hang out and I can hear the conversations in the living room through the bedroom door. Well, during part of the conversation he said he was glad he “took one of their white girls.” His friends called me a white conquest and he agreed. I felt sick. I felt like I wasn’t his girlfriend but some kind of pawn.

But this is completely out of character for him. I have no idea what to do. I want to discuss with him but don’t know how I can even broach it without being sick. Please any advice is really appreciated.




Do remember that a lot of guys front to their friends. I’m not saying it was ok, but if you say the guy has been nothing but good to you he’s likely just trying to show off for his friends. I’m sure it was hurtful to hear, and you’re right to be offended, but a lot of people in this sub are super quick to be like “omg run, you mean nothing, he’s just using you, etc. etc.” Don’t crucify a guy for being an idiot trying to sound cool or be macho in front of his friends. Guys have a long history of doing this. You know in your heart how he treats you, feels about you, and makes you feel. If thats a good thing, then don’t throw it away for this. Make sure he understands that this type of talk is not ok, and he needs to stand up for you with his friends. Rather than objectify you to sound cool. Because thats lame. I would just give an idiot the chance to make it right, before you just throw it all away. He’s either going to confirm you mean more than his buddies or that you need to find someone else. If its been great up until now, give him the chance to do that.